Chill Room – No Adults allowed

90% of the time when Beeswax and Buzzbee are in each other’s company, they are physically and mentally goading or attacking each other.
• Their arguments could put an East Enders’ slanging match to shame.
• Their bickering would make the Houses of Parliament seem harmonious.
• And if it actually manages to get to physical blows, their fights would warrant a UN peace keeping force.

Despite all their fighting there is no question in my mind that there is a deep, strong, loving bond between them and although they have a fiercely passionate relationship, they have an incredible level of attunement between them, which means usually they pick up on each other’s vibes before I have and know exactly what buttons to push.
Bumble and I have spent more time than I care to think about using our expert ‘divide and conquer’ skills but during the school holidays most of the days it is the boys and me and trying to keep the boys both entertained and not trying to kill each other is difficult.

For a long time we have felt that the boys needed a neutral zone to spend time with each other without the other feeling that their personal space (bedrooms) had been violated by the other and where neither can trump the other by saying “it is my bedroom so I get the final say”.
We needed a playroom but with no spare rooms in the house what could we do?
One afternoon early in the year, my dad came up with the solution, convert part of our garage into a ‘Chill Zone’. Actually he was joking and trying to tease the boys (the garage is quite sound proof and they were making an awful lot of noise that day). After a little bit of ‘toing and froing’ and a lot of “It wouldn’t work”, “What would people think?” “Would it be safe?” we decided it would be possible and dad volunteered to come up the next time he had a few days off and help us make it happen.

3 days of hard work and several “Where has Bumble disappeared to now?”, our sizable garage was now half its size and the boys had a space where they could be together and not feel either had the upper hand.

Stage 2                   stage 4

We had no idea whether it would work, but it has! More than we could possibly have imagined! The boys now have a space where they can exist and have fun together. Obviously the boys still have their niggles with each other and at times I have threatened that if they do not obey the rules of the room, mummy will have to turn it into her sewing/chill room. It has become such a popular space that even Beeswax would prefer to spend time in there rather than hiding away in his bedroom reading his books and Buzzbee will take himself off into it when he is feeling a little vulnerable and wants some space to play quietly with his toys.

move in day

Oh and how do I know they are not taking chunks out of each other? We have a webcam with sound so I can monitor them.

bigmother

This weeks #WASO theme is “Safe Places”.

The Weekly Adoption Shout Out
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12 thoughts on “Chill Room – No Adults allowed

  1. What a great space to give them. I must say my two boys are exactly the same and are often pushing each others buttons, trying to control each other if they’re not actually physically attacking each other. Our neutral space is the garden but in the winter we struggle. I love that you have a webcam to keep an eye on things, that’s a brilliant idea.

    Thanks for linking up with the weekly adoption shout out.

  2. What a lovely place for them to have. Looks like your dad did a great job! We don’t have a neutral space at all, in fact mine share a bedroom too, perhaps one day we’ll get around to moving, or making a space like yours.

    Thanks for linking up to #WASO

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